things i have to tell you

&   To Live

                                          reacting with phosphorus      learning without
                                          I don't react                          knowing
   I sit in my                         I see through the paper          without room
   crunched-in                      and my pen writes                  to learn how
   restraining                        poetic equations                    to know myself
   desk, they call it,              my mind plus my life              to be myself
   with my paper                   equals                                  trial and error
   and my pen                      something beyond this           minus lab write-up
   and I am                           doodles litter my                   feeling without
   supposed to see               notebook like snowflakes        a thesis
   the blackboard                  dancing through the trees       learning youth
   around the tall boy            beyond the window                 mi futuro
   en frente de mi                 the lined paper                       learning how to live
   and my mind on my          lines with soul                       without a textbook
   text and my pen on           forgetting cosines                   without a teacher to
   the page I am                   life without phosphorus           correct grammar
   supposed to                     and my life                             to live to learn myself
   for me                              mi futuro                                to live to know myself
   para mifuturo.                   beyond desk-chairs                 to live to be somebody
   but my head                     And dull muraled halls             who's learned how
   won't translate                   j.v.varsity and                         to live
   this language                    setting the curve          
   log base b of a squared;     school play and G.P.A.
   carbon monoxide               textbooks